This single stick, which you now behold3 ingloriously4 lying in that neglected corner, I once knew in a flourishing5 state in a forest. It was full of sap, full of leaves, and full of boughs6; but now in vain does the busy art of man7 pretend to vie8 with nature, by tying that withered bundle of twigs9 to its sapless trunk; it is now at best but the reverse of what it was, a tree turned upside-down, the branches on the earth, and the root in the air; it is now handled by every dirty wench10， condemned to do her drudgery11, and, by a capricious12 kind of fate, destined to make other things clean, and be nasty itself； at length13, worn to the stumps in the service of the maids, it is either thrown out of doors or condemned to the last use—of kindling14 a fire. When I beheld this I sighed, and said within myself, “Surely mortal15 man is a broomstick!” Nature sent him into the world strong and lusty16, in a thriving17 condition, wearing his own hair on his head, the proper branches of this reasoning vegetable18, till the axe of intemperance19 has lopped off20 his green boughs, and left him a withered trunk; he then flies to art and puts on a periwig21, valuing himself upon an unnatural bundle of hairs, all covered with powder, that never grew on his head; but now should this broomstick pretend to enter the scene, proud of those birchen spoils22 it never bore, and all covered with dust, through the sweepings of the finest lady’s chamber23, we should be apt to ridicule and despise its vanity. Partial judges that we are of our own excellencies, and other men’s defaults!
But a broomstick, perhaps you will say, is an emblem of a tree standing on its head; and pray what is a man but a topsy-turvy24 creature, his animal faculties25 perpetually mounted on his rational26， his head where his heels should be, grovelling27 on the earth? And yet, with all his faults, he sets up to be28 a universal reformer and corrector of abuses， a remover of grievances, rakes into every slut’s corner of nature, bringing hidden corruptions to the light and raises a mighty dust where there was none before, sharing deeply all the while in the very same pollutions he pretends to sweep away. His last days are spent in slavery to women, and generally the least deserving; till, worn to the stumps, like his brother besom29， he is either kicked out of doors, or made use of to kindle flames for others to warm themselves by.
眼前你看见的这把扫帚孤零零地躺在被人遗忘的角落里,毫不起眼。然而我知道，以前它生长在密林中，欣欣向荣。它曾生气勃勃，枝繁叶茂，但如今爱管闲事的人却动手把枯枝捆扎于它那枯桩上，装模作样地同自然徒然抗争。如今它充其量只是以前模样的倒转——一棵本末倒置的树，枝条伏地，根部朝天，听由脏兮兮的女佣随手使唤，并且被无常的命运捉弄，注定要去清扫他物，把自己搞得污秽不堪。最后，被女佣用成一根光杆儿，要么被扔出门外，要么最后充当引火的木柴。我看到这番情景时不禁叹息，心里默默念道：“毫无疑问，人就是一把扫帚！”自然把人这种“理性植物”降生到世上之时他结实健康，生气勃勃，满头浓发，直到“放纵”的利斧将翠枝砍斫殆尽，仅留下一根萎蔫的秃杆儿。这时他就急切地装扮自己，给自己戴上假发，并以这种满敷香粉但并非自己头皮所生里的饰物而炫耀自己。但假使这把满身尘垢的扫帚现在自命不凡地出现在我们面前，以那些并非自己身体所生的攫来的枝条为荣，因在美人的香闺里做过清洁而得意，我们也会对其虚荣嗤之以鼻。我们对以己之长与他人之短的评判竟会如此有失公允！
但你也许会说：“扫帚只是倒置的树的象征。”那么请问：“人不也是一种乱七八糟的东西，兽性总是凌驾于理性之上，头与脚错位倒置，低声下气地苟活于世？”尽管自己一身缺点，却以万能的改革者和矫枉者的身份自居，自视为一切不平事的清道夫，触角之深之广甚至连荡妇的隐私都不肯放过。揭露腐朽于光天之下，将清白之地搞得乌烟瘴气。他自命清除一切污秽，但同时自己也沾染甚多。晚年他屈尊委身于女佣之手，而此等女佣也多属无聊之辈。直到被磨成光杆儿，然后就像他的长柄扫帚兄弟一样，要么被踢出室门，要么用作点火干柴，供人取暖。
Notes: 1. broomstick 扫帚把儿
2. Jonathan Swift 乔纳森·斯威夫特(1667-1745), 英国杰出的讽刺文学家、散文家
3. behold 看见，目睹
4. ingloriously 默默无闻地
5. flourishing 欣欣向荣的
6. bough 主枝
7. art of man （同自然相对而言的）人工。 art 意为 “矫作,人工装扮”
8. vie 竞争 9. twig 末梢,小枝
10. wench 女佣
11. drudgery 苦差事
12. capricious 反复无常的
13. at length 最后
14. kindle 点燃
15. mortal 人类的，终有一死的
16. lusty 精力充沛的
17. thriving 旺盛的
18. reasoning 有理性的； vegetable 此处泛指植物
19. intemperance 放纵
20. lop off 砍掉
21. periwig 假发
22. spoil 战利品
23. chamber 寝室
24. topsy-turvy 颠倒的,乱七八糟的
25. faculty 技能,天赋
26. rational即rational faculties（理性）
27. grovel 卑躬屈膝，奴颜婢膝
28. set up to be 装作
29. besom 长柄扫帚 |
